Archive for Weight Loss

SHAME! GET YOUR FAT BUTT OFF MY CHAIR!

Someone asked me why I didn’t blog last week.  I responded that “I didn’t have any big aha moments so there was nothing to report.”  I’ve had some time to think about what I said and I now believe it was a mistake to skip last week.  My response implied if nothing big happens, then that week is a write-off…a nothing week, but in fact, there will often be weeks where nothing happens and yet there can still be a lot of learning.  I beg your understanding as I am always learning.  I will do better next time!

There was a “happening” in my life this week, a shameful experience I am not excited to share, but when I try to bury shameful secrets deep inside, they come back to haunt me.  I start to believe I am the only one that has experienced this and begin to eat my emotions in an attempt to numb them and keep those awful feelings away.  My numbing drug of choice was cookies this time, but only four, which is a win of sorts for me.  I bounced back much more quickly this time.  Now I need to tell my story and get it out in the open so it is no longer controlling my actions!

I went for dinner with my parents on Friday evening to a local Thai restaurant.  It is a lovely place that I have frequented in the past so I felt very comfortable walking in their door.  I approached the hostess and asked for a table for three and mentioned we would love if we could sit in the little balcony area at the back.  She looked at me a bit funny and mumbled something about sitting on the main floor.  I looked at the balcony and could see there was no one there this early in the evening so I tried again.  “We would really like to sit on the balcony,” I said.  This time, her comment was a bit clearer, “The chairs on the main floor are much roomier.”  WTH!  Is she saying what I think she’s saying?!  Is this tiny Asian girl really trying to tell me my ass is too big for their chairs!

This would have been the perfect opportunity for me to use the “sitting on your face” comment I told you about in an earlier blog, but as I stood there and felt the shame begin to boil up from my gut and wash over me, I wasn’t thinking about catchy phrases.  I very indignantly told her that we had eaten on the balcony a number of times and those chairs were just fine.  How dare she!  I was very aware of her watching me as we were seated on the balcony so I made a show of plopping my butt down into the chair with a “See!  I told you it fit!” flounce!

I am still processing this experience.  I don’t know whether to put a kind spin on her actions or get really pissed.  Was she trying to help me avoid embarrassment or was she aggressively attempting to embarrass me?  I have no way to know what she might be dealing with in her own life or what might have happened to her that evening.  For now, I will give her the benefit of the doubt.  Something I read in Brene Brown’s book “Rising Strong” (my take-away from her words, not an exact quote) really struck a chord with me.  Right now I will choose to believe she was doing the very best she could in that situation because that makes my life better.

I would love if you shared a similar experience and how you handled it.  Or maybe you would just like to share your thoughts on how feel you might have handled this situation?  If you don’t want to make a public comment, please feel free to reach out to me with a personal message on my Facebook page www.facebook.com/PhitandPhabulousDeb.

To finish, I am going to quote my eBook from 2013 and say, “The weight between your ears is causing the weight on your ass.”  I believe by sharing another shameful secret, I am dropping more of the weight between my ears and this will ultimately impact my ass. What if today, you reach out to someone you trust and share a shameful secret?  Give it a try and see how much lighter you feel!

 

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Back to the Diet Basics…sigh

The “sigh” in the title of this blog is the work of the little devil on my shoulder that I have named Munch.  Munch doesn’t understand why I have to go back over all the diet basics of eating healthy.  She insists “I already know it all and would be wasting my time.”

Munch is constantly nattering away at me.  At work on Thursday, it was employee appreciation day and we were served a special lunch.  I had the healthy wrap from Chopped Leaf, raw fruit, and indulged in one slice of cake.  I completely skipped the chips and nachos, but at the end of the meal when they handed out the little chocolate disks with ‘Thank You’ stamped into them, Munch insisted I have not one…not two…not three…but four.

Off and on throughout the day, Munch kept reminding me that there was a bowlful of those chocolate disks just crying out for me to eat them, but I held strong and ignored her.  Right before I left work for my long weekend, she made one last attempt saying, “You had cake at lunch.  You’ve already screwed up today.  Just grab a bunch of those chocolate disks and we’ll eat them all tonight and start fresh tomorrow.”

Do you have any idea how my evening would have gone if I had given in and grabbed the chocolate disks?  I do.  I have lived that particular scenario hundreds, if not thousands of time in my life.  The chocolate disks would never have been enough.  I would have stopped on the way home to buy just enough snack foods for the evening.

The problem is, I probably would have purchased a lot more than I could consume in one evening so I would have been “forced” to finish them off the next day.  And if there weren’t enough snacks for the next day, I could just top them up.  Do you see where this endless loop is heading?  Have you, like me, ever done that?

This week I was reminded of the diet basic “TOMORROW NEVER COMES!”

If your eating is out of control and you are telling yourself you will start eating healthy tomorrow, after the weekend, after the party, after payday, after you eat up all the bad food in the fridge and cupboards, after “you fill in the blank“, then it is time to wake up!  Tomorrow never comes!  There is never a perfect time to begin…so just get started!

Every minute of every day is another chance to start over.  Do it now!

 

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SUICIDE BY FOOD!

It’s confession time!  I need to pull my head out of my ass and deal with my reality, and admitting there is a problem is the first step!

I’ve been hiding for far too long.  I was battling some emotional demons and felt myself starting to slide down that slippery slope to weight gain.  In spite of the fact that I had previously lost 250 lbs. and I knew exactly what steps I had to take to avoid that slide, I let it happen.

I didn’t do any of the things I used to tell you to do:

  • Decide that you need to make some changes and start making small changes today – don’t put them off until “tomorrow”
  • Ask for help, don’t try to do it all by yourself
  • Don’t operate from a mindset of lack…think about the good things you can add to your eating instead of what you need to take away

I told myself that I couldn’t admit I was having problems.  I was supposed to be a weight loss expert.  I couldn’t let anyone know that I wasn’t perfect.  WHAT WOULD PEOPLE THINK?!

The fact is, I have gained weight.  How much?  I don’t know and I don’t care!  Remember, I told you to throw away your scale – you don’t need to know how much you weigh, you just need to know how your clothes fit and how you feel?

Well, I had to buy larger clothes and I feel like shit!  My joints ache and I can’t move like I used to.  I’ve even given up walking and the Aquasize fitness classes that I love.  I told myself this was only temporary—tonight I will just finish eating up all the crappy food in the cupboards and fridge and then tomorrow I will get back to my healthy eating.  I’ve got this.  I’ve lost weight before and I can do it again.

Surprise!  Tomorrow never came.  I had to keep buying new crappy food so I could finish eating it tonight and start tomorrow.  I was caught in an endless loop of my own making…one I didn’t feel I could pull out of.  I’m not sure I wanted to pull out of it…I was committing suicide by food!

I am truly grateful for the amazing people in my life that stood by me through all this turmoil.  They believed, when I did not, that I would pull through and begin the journey back to my healthier self.  You know who you are.  I love you!

It’s time for me to get “back to basics”.  Part of my journey back to health will be posting blogs on a more regular basis.  Yes, I already know what I need to do, but I haven’t been doing it, so maybe I need to learn it on a deeper level.  I will start back at the beginning and learn it all over again.

If you, like me, have been struggling and are feeling unwell, please join me.  Forget what is past and let’s create a new future together.  We can do this!  We are worth the effort!

If you cannot accept that I have made mistakes and I have learned from them, then unlike my page and move on with your life.

My first inclination was to apologize for letting people down, but what I have come to realize is that I am the only one I let down.  And if you think back, you will remember that one of the first lessons I taught others is self-love and forgiveness.  I am not perfect.  I made mistakes.  I forgive myself.  <3

 

“God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change,

               the courage to change the one I can,

                and the wisdom to know…IT’S ME!”

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DUCK! I THREW MY SCALE OUT THE WINDOW!

I advise people all the time not to weigh themselves. I suggest they trust their bodies to tell them how they are doing based on how their clothes fit and how they feel. Those are the important measures, not a damn number on a scale.

I am seeing a naturopath and have made some lifestyle changes. The naturopath has a really fancy scale that measures body weight, fat and muscle. The first month I lost 17 pounds including 6 pounds of fat. That sounded good to me until she explained the other 11 pounds I lost was muscle. Whoa! Time to increase my workouts!

Today was the end of my second month. I feel amazing and my clothes are looser, but I was dying of curiosity, so I ignored my own advice and hopped on my home scale. I was bummed to see only 10 pounds gone.

When I got on the doctor’s scale, she informed me that I had lost 18 pounds of fat. What?! How could I have lost 18 pounds of fat when the scale was only 10 pounds lighter? That didn’t make sense, until she explained that I had gained 8 pounds of muscle!

Is gaining muscle a good thing? You better believe it! In my eBook, ‘The Weight Between Your Ears is Causing the Weight on Your Ass’, I talk about how my trainer taught me that muscles are fat-burning machines and if you build them up, your muscles will continuously burn fat… even while you are sleeping. If you haven’t already claimed your gift copy of my eBook, get it now at http://debrondeau.com/products/ebook/.

Are you still a slave to your scale? Do the numbers on the scale dictate how you feel about yourself or what kind of day you will have?

STOP! Throw your scale out the window NOW! There are so many factors that can affect that number. Do not let the scale rule your life! Trust your body; listen to what it is telling you because it will never lead you astray!

Learn to love yourself… just the weigh you are.

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MY SCALE MADE ME CRY!

I have been working with a naturopath for several weeks. The first thing she did was take blood for some very detailed tests to determine 1) what foods are causing bad reactions in my body and 2) was I born with this sensitivity, or did I develop it?

I felt I was eating very healthy. Imagine my surprise when I discovered that many of the foods I thought were good for me, were actually causing inflammation and pain in my joints! Some examples: almonds, hazelnuts, quinoa, spelt, oranges and cranberries.

One month ago, after the test results came in, my naturopath designed an eating program for me and suggested some supplements that could help. I have been following that program 100% for an entire month and last Saturday was my check-in to see how I was doing.

Keep in mind that I have done my weekly workouts with my trainer and training partner each Friday, I started Aquafit classes at my gym, and I am walking regularly. I promised myself this time I would not be a slave to the scale, so I didn’t weigh myself at home or at the gym the entire month.

I have felt huge differences since I began my new eating program. The pain in my joints is gone and my clothes are getting looser. Based on past experiences with diets, I felt that I had lost at least 30 lbs. in the past month (fast weight loss in the beginning has always been my history).

Well, when the naturopath weighed me, she said I had lost 6 lbs. of fat and she was really happy with that!. Of course, my old DIEt mentality kicked in, and I had to ask how many total lbs. I have lost by the scale. The answer was…. 17 lbs.

17 lbs.?  In a month?  Hell, I’ve lost that in a week in the past! I was not happy! On the drive home, I burst into tears in my car.  Logically, I realize that 4 lbs. per week is amazing, but I set myself up, mentally, by expecting the loss should be 30 lbs. or higher.

I am working through the emotional impact this has had on me, but I wonder if you have experienced this before?  Have you set yourself up with high expectiations, then come crashing down when you don’t meet them?  How did you work through this?

I would love to hear your story…..

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