Recently, I have been working on learning self-compassion. This does not come naturally to me, due to my life-long pattern of people-pleasing. My childhood conditioning is to please others in order to get the attention and love I crave.
It was not easy, but I have made the decision to change that!
I used to believe that what I wanted was not important, that a “nice” person always puts the desires of others ahead of their own. I believed that thinking of my own needs was selfish.
I feared that voicing my opinion might hurt other’s feelings, so I remained silent.
I didn’t take chances because I feared I might get hurt or fail. Life is just as beautiful from the sidelines, and so much safer, right?
What I have learned is, by living my life in this way, I was telling myself, “You don’t matter and I don’t love you.”
So what, you ask, am I doing to change this?
- I am making decisions – go ahead, ask me anything 🙂
- I am giving my opinion when asked – my honest opinion, not what I think you want to hear
- I am taking chances and participating in life. I am trying new things – one day soon I will share my exciting new venture with you
- I am showing myself affection by eating to feel healthy, trying fun, new ways to exercise, and becoming more aware of how I speak to myself internally
Am I perfect all the time? No, but I show myself compassion when I fail. I realize that changing a life-long pattern will not happen overnight. I just keep moving forward and celebrating the baby steps along the way.
I am freaking AMAZING… You are too!
Do something today, just for you, to show how very special and precious you are.